Open Letters To Our Moms
Three women choose healing through writing
Here at HIP, we are all about practical wisdom and emotional growth. We know that everyone approaches healing differently, whether by exploring therapy, reading, journaling, or a combination of these ideas and others. Take journaling for example – while an excellent tool (find our journaling tips here), if you’re anything like us, it can be difficult to know where to start and how to face the vulnerability of writing. That’s why a few members of the HIP team recently explored an impactful way to get thoughts and emotions down on paper, within specific guidelines and with a clear objective in mind.
Writing an Open Letter
Writing an open letter to someone with whom you have a difficult relationship, or wrongs in need of exploration and forgiveness, can be extremely therapeutic. According to A Conscience Rethink, “It’s an opportunity for you to exorcise all manner of hurts, giving you a safe space to express all your feelings without worry about judgment or recrimination.” While you can choose never to share the letter with whom it is intended, written and well thought out, authentic feelings can also be a point of reference when having a face-to-face conversation.
Maybe it’s not a person who is causing you grief. Writing break-up letters to debt is the philosophy that allowed deardebt.com founder, Melanie Lockert, to get out from under crippling student loans. After sharing her reflective journey online, others all around the world chimed in with their debt stories and started the phenomenon "Dear Debt." She balances authentic and transparent truth with positive steps for finding life after debt. Listen to her interview here.
Recently, actor Jennette McCurdy used a similar approach, sharing her toxic mother/daughter relationship in her one-woman show and subsequent book, both titled I’m Glad My Mom Died, where she details her experiences and journey to health and healing.
Similarly, three women at Health: It’s Personal used writing as a step in the healing process regarding relationships with their own mothers. Their journeys are similar in same ways, but each is at a different stage in the grieving and healing process. They were so generous to share their stories with us and we now share them with you in hopes that they become discussion starters, and offer comfort and connection.
We’re just going to say it – relationships are hard!
Strained parental relationships are much more common than many people realize, so please know that you are not alone. We hope you enjoy the following three letters from three brave women, and we invite you to write letters to your own mothers or loved ones as a way forward. Brenee Brown says, “Empathy creates a hostile environment for shame—an environment it can’t survive in because shame needs you to believe you’re alone.” We welcome any and all participants in this practice to send us your letters at info@thehippodcast.com. We would love to share them with our wonderful health community and HIP family.