You Are Not Alone!
By Kate Shively
Going through a tough time? Feel like you’re the only one?
We promise - You are Not Alone!
If this podcast has taught us anything about the human condition, it is this: despite the fact that there are almost eight billion people on this planet, we can feel quite alone in our struggles. Oftentimes, we feel like we are the only person struggling with mental illness, the only person who lost a parent at a young age, who made poor financial decisions, who can’t have a biological child. The only person who carries shame or grief or anger.
Social media isn’t helping. As we scroll, we see perfectly groomed people in a perfect setting - the 30 seconds of their day that was staged accompanied by a funny, romantic or upbeat tune. How do we relate to that? How can any of those people understand what we are feeling or how we are hurting?
Chances are, they are hurting too.
So much of our pain, grief and shameful moments are stigmatized. We aren’t supposed to talk about suicide or addiction. We can’t share our loss.
Thankfully, many of our generous guests have shared their personal stories of struggle as well as the lessons gained, which has helped us realize we are far less alone than we once thought. Experts and regular folks alike have gone through similar things as we have, and while they might not have all the answers, it’s relieving to hear their stories, perspectives, and approaches.
Three Ways to Feel Less Alone
Help Others
Help me, Help You! Helping someone else can relieve stress and produce some of the same mental benefits as exercise. Whether it is giving of your time, talents or money, helping others can be a mentally beneficial way to help you and someone else feel less alone in this world.
Join an Online Community
Now more than ever, people are flocking to online communities in order to escape the isolation perpetuated by the pandemic. Looking online to find your people is a clever way to connect if you have physical limitations, time restrictions, or just prefer the comfort of your home. Want to explore a new hobby, connect with specific people that share your interest or learn something new? Connecting with others can improve mental health and bring joy to your life.
Write It Down
Like meditation, journaling can clear our minds. Journaling serves many purposes and can untangle our thoughts to help us to reflect, grieve, or practice gratitude. It can also feel vulnerable, but the best part is, there is no right way to do it. Read further - In Defense of Journaling (With Tips for Beginners)
HIP Episodes to Keep You Company
Anxiety Series: Car Therapy with High School Senior Henry
High School can be an exciting and challenging time. We had the profound pleasure of speaking to a high school senior that finally found balance. However, it wasn’t always that easy. During our chat, Henry walks us through the ins and outs of social anxiety while navigating the biggest year of his life so far. He shares his procrastination journey, explains how he’s learned to trick his brain and shows how teens can be a great support to one another during this confusing time. He provides practical wisdom for teens and the adults who support them.
Read: Five Active ways to Support a Teen with Anxiety
Nutrition Series: True Beauty with Miss Wisconsin USA, Gabriella Deyi
Journalist, mental health advocate and Miss Wisconsin USA, Gabriella Deyi, shares all of the "dips and curves" along her path from scientist to titleholder, and the challenging journey that led her to a strong relationship with nutrition and body image. She explains how there is no beauty without purpose behind it and the importance of competing in pageants with healthy practices, confidence and integrity. She discusses the pitfalls of focusing on external beauty and how under-eating and over-exercising isn’t the path to happiness or fulfillment.
Gabby talks directly to parents and young adults about what’s truly important (hint: not what we see on social media) and how finding her "why" helped her turn passion into purpose, as well as offering young people action steps to understanding their true worth in a discussion that dives into nutrition, as much as food insecurity, race and empowerment.
Read: The Confidence Code - Katty Kay and Claire Shipman
Parenting Series: Addiction and Hope with Author Deborah Edwards
We love and nurture our kids; though as they become teens, there can be a disconnection. It is challenging to know if it is 'normal' teen behavior or something more. Author and executive coach Deborah Edwards found herself in a moment of 'something more'. While her son, Andrew, became addicted to drugs, she had to balance her own health through his recovery and relapse. It is a beautiful story of parental love, self-love and triumph. She shares this journey in her book, High, and in this episode, provides tips for parents to navigate challenging moments with children and addiction. She explains the concept of patient love as well as living experientially and how those two practices helped her find deeper understanding along her journey. Her bravery and awareness help us to understand that one person’s journey, even that of a child, does not have to be your own.
Read: High - Book - Deborah Edwards
Coping Mini-Series: Notes from Your Therapist with Author Allyson Dinneen
Marriage and family therapist, mental health counselor, Instagram phenom and author of Notes from Your Therapist, Allyson Dinneen shares her refreshing collection of affirmations that gives readers the permission to feel all their emotions, no matter how uncomfortable. Her comfortability with and deep understanding of emotion, loss and grief largely come from the immense loss in her own life. She addresses the importance of knowing how we feel, and the power of realizing and accepting one’s emotions. Allyson is driven to teach younger people compassion and empathy in order to create a better tomorrow.
Read: Notes from Your Therapist - Allyson Dinneen
Financial Series: Serving Your Community with Financial Life Healer Louis Barajas
Author and Financial Life Healer Louis Barajas comes from humble beginnings and therefore has made serving underrepresented communities his life’s work. He says it’s not about providing financial literacy, but finding connection, and viewing money not as a goal but as a tool to create a better quality of life. He encourages clients and friends to invest in their relationships, mental and physical health and education as well as retirement planning so that when those days come, they are able to enjoy it with the people they love.
Read: The Latino Journey to Financial Greatness - Louis Barajas
Depression Series: LGBTQ+ Mental Health with Advocate and Model Trevor Leeper
Trevor Leeper is a mental health advocate in the LGBTQ community and has a magnificent story to share about the struggles he faced coming out in a religious household with a family that didn't quite understand what he was going through or support him in the way he needed. Now, he’s in a wonderful place and caring for the community and others who are in similar circumstances in the way he wish he had been cared for. Trevor is such a light, and he inspires us through his example of being someone going through dark times, questioning their worth, but ultimately making it through the other side stronger and more whole.
Sexual Health Series: Purity Culture with Sexuality Educator Erica Smith
Sexuality educator Erica Smith not only discussed with us her experience as a sexuality educator, but her time working with individuals raised in purity culture, and their experience with her company Purity Culture Dropout. This is a wonderful episode not only to get some real information about sexual health and sexuality but also to think about how purity culture has and continues to impact all of us every day.
For those experiences that contributed to our growth, inner peace and strength, we’re here to say:
You Are Not Alone!
We hope this line of merchandise brings you as much joy as it does for us. Through all of these tough conversations with guests and experts as well as our personal reflections and connections to these topics, one of the biggest coping mechanisms we’ve employed is connection. Connection is recognizing that even when life hands you personal challenges, there are human and experiential threads that connect us to others - more than we can possibly imagine.
Each month, we plan to share a new saying that was inspired by one of our many amazing conversations. Please consider sharing these healing and connecting words with your friends, family and community. They make great gifts and have the ability to inspire and bridge groups in your schools, offices and places of worship. If you have a group that would like to spread their own message, reach out and we can create a campaign just for you!
Want to know when we launch a new message? Follow us on social media or click here to join our email list.
As we revisit all the inspiration behind this merch line, we wanted to give a shout-out to some of our most inspiring episodes—we so appreciate all of our guests, but especially these highlights, as they dove into some seriously tough conversations!
The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones.
Please call 800-273-8255
And please know that your life is valuable and that you matter. Listen, engage, subscribe and send us topics that will help you on your journey.
Have a story you’d like to share? We’d love to hear it. Send us a message, comment below or tag us on Instagram @theHIPpodcast.